Eggs!

Somebody egged my car the other night while it was sitting out in front of Gary and Sheri's place. Honestly...who eggs cars in this day and age? Haven't there been any breakthroughs in pranksterisms since I was a kid. I guess the old standbys are still the best. I remember my youthful days (but mostly nights) filled with toilet papering houses, egging cars, breaking windows, mailboxing, etc. Heck, we were creative and even used tapioca pudding on occasion (when it was left over from Wed. night meals at the church). Toppling garbage cans, setting raked leaf piles on fire...these and other mischievous events were a staple in my day. Alas, I have grown up now and I am reduced to being the old man who stands on his porch and yells, "Get out of my yard, you dang kids!" Well, I would. If I had a yard.

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow!

What's the deal? As my age advances, hair disapears from where I want it and appears in places that don't make sense. I'm not bald...yet...but I suffer from a slightly receding hairline. What I want to know is why does the hair leave my head and sprout from other places. I've got hair sprouting from my ears and nose, my eyebrows have decided they want to resemble a Wookie and I don't even want to talk about unmentionable places. Now, they make nose hair clippers and I bought some once but all it seemed to do was massage the inside of my nose. The hair was still there but all my mucus was blended into a nice frappe. (Booger Blender...from Ronco!) My ears...well...let's just say I've had to add the hairy things to my shaving routine. I've got one wild hair on my ear that would grow to the length of a python if I let it. My eyebrows are starting to do that little upturn, curly-Q thing at the points which are great if playing a villian in the latest blockbuster flick but for everyday aesthetics, forget it. Now, I've seen these old men who have the jungles sprouting from their noses and their ears look like Yoda's. Their eyebrows seem to be growing upward for a possible combover to hide the recession. I just want to know...what's up? Why won't the hair grow where I want it and stop growing where I don't want it? It's a mystery and a hairy situation...depending on where you look.

Greenwood Seafair Parade Part Deux

Well, Sarah and I have accomplished our duties as emcees of the parade. It was fairly simple, once we got the hang of things. Basically, I just let the cheesy dialogue flow like wine and Sarah milked the crowd and let some of the parade participants have their say. One lady hogged the mic and held up the parade for a few moments. A couple of guys kissed her, one was a "cowboy" and the other, a "pirate." It was goofy. One of the pirates stole my mic and made his own commentary which was fine with me because, at the time, I was trying to scarf down a slice of pizza. Another pirate tried to steal the box of trophies and the lady on the platform bit him. Pretty crazy stuff. Afterward, we gave out the trophies and this was the highlight for the drill teams. They ate it up. All in all, a good experience and made a little money to boot. Sarah and I are going to use the bucks for a nice date for ourselves...the zoo or something like that.

Greenwood Seafair Parade

Tonight is the Greenwood parade. Greenwood is the neighborhood that Taproot Theater is in. Sarah emailed a few minutes ago and said that people were already staking out their spots along the street. Pretty big deal I guess. Sarah and I are emcee-ing the parade. I'll announce the floats and she's to work the crowd. Not sure what else is involved. Karen hooked us up with that. I'm a bit nervous since I've not been here that long. I hope it goes ok. Afterward, there's a concert at the Green Bean (coffeehouse run by Sanctuary) and I'm sure Sarah and I will check that out. Due to the crowds, I guess I'll have to park at Sarah's and walk. Oh well, it's only a few blocks.

Booklist

What I've read or am reading:
The Loch by Steve Alten - Marine biologist Zachary Wallace must uncover the mysteries of Loch Ness in time to save his father who is accused of a loch related murder. Weaving together elements of Scottish history and new theories about "Nessie," Alten has spun a tale that is a brisk, fun read. Of course, I'm a sucker for a story about monsters...but that's just me.
Arthur and the Minimoys by Luc Besson - 10 year old Arthur must find and save the world of the Minimoys, a race that is only 3/4 inch tall, in order to discover the fate of his missing grandfather. This book was written by Besson, director of such films as The Professional and The Fifth Element. I wanted to enjoy this but it's very elementary. I'm sure it's a very good little adventure for kids (for whom it was intended) but I found it flat and dull. Oh well, guess I shouldn't read kids books, huh?
The Stand by Stephen King - A plague reduces the world's population while an ancient evil grows to challenge the few people who are left. I put this book down after getting 3/4 through it. It was a struggle to read. I know it's supposed to be one of King's best but I just couldn't get into it. I much prefer Swan Song by Robert R. McCammon as far as this genre is concerned.

Artist of Note

While living in Birmingham in 1996, I met an artist who lived next door to me. We hit it off and became fast friends. I moved back to Pensacola and he eventually moved to Seattle. (I can't find him...I hear he's moved back to Birmingham) I love his work and own two of his paintings. You can read about him here or check out more at www.garde-rail.com.

ANTJUAN ODEN - THE MYTH OF CAPTIVITY AND THE TRUTH OF CONSEQUENCE
In the fall of 2000, in what can only be deemed as unjust circumstances, Garde Rail Gallery artist Antjuan Oden began a 15 month jail term. Even as Antjuan's art was used against him in his trial, his spirit to create could not be broken and he continued to paint while in prison. This exhibit will feature work completed while in captivity, as well as compelling new pieces Antjuan has completed since his release. Self-taught artist Antjuan Oden has shown with Garde Rail Gallery since he moved to the Pacific Northwest in the summer of 1998. Born in Birmingham in 1972, Antjuan quickly flooded the scene with his powerful, energetic, vibrant works on paper and wood. His mixed media assemblages captured the attention of galleries in Atlanta, and he was soon featured in Art Papers. After a flurry of activity between Birmingham and Atlanta, Antjuan sensed that he needed a change and landed in Tacoma. Antjuan Oden is considered one of the brightest talents of the next generation of self-taught artists. Creating with the same intensity and compulsion as many of the African-American vernacular artists of the South, Antjuan incorporates a modern awareness and urban iconography into his widely varied works. Over the last few months, Antjuan has established a new lexicon of imagery to work with that you may see often in these new paintings; a birdcage, a lotus plant, missiles, horses and elephants. This body of work also showcases Antjuan's painting style, and promises that his new work will be heading in exciting new directions. While in prison, with no access to art supplies, Antjuan still completed nearly 200 works. Of these, 75 tiny paintings were completed with tissue paper as brushes and coffee as paint, using scraps of paper salvaged from prison regulation sheets and drink mix sachets as his canvas. It is this body of work that exemplifies the commitment to create that resides inside Antjuan. "I have to paint. I can't stop - it's ridiculous!" - Antjuan Oden, July 1998

Writing Ideas

"Maybe this world is another planet's hell." - Aldous Huxley

I read this quote a few years ago and it gave me an idea for a story. I record it here so I won't forget to write that story.

I also have ideas for other stories that could become novels. I'm also going to record them here so I won't forget.

- Midnight Madness
- Coffinville
- Warlock Country
- The Spider Tree

Eyes of God

As I was driving home tonight, I looked to my right and in the car next to me was an old black man with white hair staring at me with the eyes of God.

Stoplights

Tonight, as I was driving home, I was struck with the thought of how much my life is like driving. I'm headed down a stretch of road, doing pretty well, building up a good speed, momentum and the like, when all of a sudden a red light hinders me. Finally it turns green and I'm on my way again. A mile down the road it happens again. Again and again, as I get going, those pesky stoplights bog me down. Lately, I feel like I've been sitting at a stoplight that is malfunctioning. It won't turn green and there's no cop to wave me thru. I'm just sitting here waiting for something to happen. I'm tired of sitting at the stoplights. Give me the open highway where I can get my speed going, slip the cruise control on, put on some good tunes and make good time to my destination. They say, "It's not the destination but the journey that counts." Well, a journey at a dead stop is pretty dull. At least show me a little of my destination. Show me on a map where I'm headed. Give me a goal to reach for. Right now, I'm broke down in the ditch waiting for a tow truck.

Artist of Note

Every once in a while, I am going to highlight an artist that I like. This week, it's Gary Baseman. To the general public, he's the guy that created Disney's Teacher's Pet cartoon. Well, he's been around alot longer than that. I like the way he blends cartoon art with fine art. Pretty amazing and fun stuff. You can learn more about him at www.garybaseman.com.

Booklist

What I've read or am reading:
Illegal Alien by Robert J. Sawyer - Seemingly benevolent aliens land on earth and are treated well until there's a murder. What ensues is the first trial involving extraterrestrial life. I don't usually read sci-fi but Sawyer does it well. The characters are not overshadowed by the technology. He's more about character than weird space stuff.
The Good, the Bad, and the Undead by Kim Harrison - Second in a series about a bounter hunter/witch who operates in a post-plague America where regular citizens mix with supernatural creatures like vampires, werewolves, and pixies. I'm much more into fantasy than sci-fi but I prefer fantasy set in the modern world rather than Lord of the Rings type stuff.
Vigil by Robert Massello - A fallen angel released from a fossil wreaks havoc on New York city. I didn't enjoy this one as much as I thought I would because the author chose the low road and not much happened. He did leave it open for a sequel but I'm not sure I'll go there.
Fragments by James F. David - This is a re-read. It's immensely enjoyable. Scientists use computer technology to join several autistic children together to form a new entity, blending their various skills into one new creation. Of course, something goes wrong and chaos ensues. Wouldn't be a good story if it didn't. I highly recommend this one.

Mickey Mouse Antichrist?

Yesterday, I came across a post saying that the Southern Baptists had decided to end their boycott of Disney. Well, as Adam Sandler would say, "Whoop-iddy-doo!" It also said that they felt the boycott was successful and that they had cost Disney hundreds of millions of dollars. What a joke. Does Disney look like they've been hurt at all by this? I don't see any open wounds. Granted, I understand that some of the things going on at Disney would cause ol' Walt to spin in his grave like the teacup ride on caffeine but boycotting is not a solution. If only the SBC could realize that the world knows far more about what they are against and very little about what they are for. The simple fact of the matter is that the church (not just Southern Baptist) has become an intentity associated with political backstabbing, low integrity, and in some cases, just plain evil behavior. No wonder folks are leaving in droves. Didn't mean to hop on my soapbox here, it's just that I desire to see change...change I have tried to help happen...and I've gotten burned. Open your eyes, church. You are the bride of Christ but you're not being a very good bride. You are a cheating, backstabbing, golddigging, manipulative harlot. Christ deserves June Cleaver but he's gotten Cruella De Ville. Hmmm. A Disney villian. Perhaps that is fitting. At least for the Southern Baptists.

I Am Gay-Friendly

Found this on the Baptist Press website. Pretty amazing perspective. Can't believe it's on the website. I was actually on there looking for a contact email so I could write a scorching letter about the Disney boycott. Found this instead.

NEW YORK (BP)--I literally was birthed into Southern Baptist evangelicalism. Both of my parents are in the ministry. Recently, my father became the vice president of evangelism at the North American Mission Board. Before that, he was a Southern Baptist pastor for longer than I have seen the light of the sun. I write this on lunch break in my corner of an office of The 411, a New York City church (on 42nd street, sponsored heavily by Southern Baptist churches from the deep south) who are embracing a radical, risky and eternally rewarding way of life described in the same book that calls the homosexual lifestyle sin. Romans 12:21 reads, "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."Overcome evil with condemnation? Overcome evil by shaking our heads, refusing to go see the Disney movie "Tarzan"? No. Overcome evil with GOOD. Today the staff of The 411 hauled hundreds of water bottles to a dancer's call audition for the revival of the Broadway musical "A Chorus Line" (infamous for being the first successful musical to openly deal with and affirm homosexuality in the arts). We walked into a room full of hopeful dancers and nervous producers and said "Hey, this water is free for you guys. We're from a new church called The 411 and we just want to say that God loves you." The man running the audition looked at me with a blank stare and then said, "Wow, that's ... well ... that's just ... wow ... that's ... amazing!" Then he announced to the entire room, "Hey these church people just brought you guys all free water!" I then heard him turn aside and mutter to himself, "Wow that is just amazing."Yes, it's amazing. The goodness of God who sent His only Child to be brutally murdered on behalf of a human race who rebelled against Him is amazingly GOOD! In no way should a person who claims to follow Jesus Christ advocate a lifestyle that so clearly is spoken against in the Word of God. However,we trust that by meeting the basic needs of lost people, doors will open to share with them the hope of a new life in Christ. I have caught a dangerous trend arising in my generation, which "loves Christ but not the church."Not all of this is our fault. We are crying out for our elders to step back and allow us to step up. We are crying out for them to fund relevant college ministries even though most of us cannot drop as much as they can in the offering plate. However, we are crying out immaturely, like a 2-year-old throwing a tantrum in a grocery store. Abandoning or "taking a break from" church is neither the right thing to do, nor is it any kind of solution to the problem. The SBC needs a new generation of leaders from us 20-somethings to do what Christ commanded before he ascended into heaven. He said, "GO therefore ..." not "Runaway therefore ..." not "Condemn therefore....""Go therefore and make disciples...." [Matthew 28:19] With everything in me, I believe that is the heart of what Southern Baptist evangelism was meant to be. Whether your hair is gray or streaked with purple, if you claim to follow Jesus Christ you are called to go directly into a bleeding, slimy, hurting, desperate, dying world, and defeat the inherent evil of people's souls with the good of the Father. I love Jesus. I believe every word of the Bible and I believe we should live it by sharing it with the lost. I am gay-friendly.

AC Moore

While in Asheville, I worked at an arts/crafts store called AC Moore. The people there were great and I miss seeing them alot. While there, I did the announcements over the PA. One of the girls, Alina, emailed me the other day to tell me that she and Ana had done an announcement. Here's what she had to say:

"So Ana and I did a super cheesy announcement today that I think you (THE Ultimate Cheesy Announcer) would be really proud of.
Ana: Hey Alina, did you hear about the great sale on merchandise?
Me: Yeah, Ana, all gardening merchandize is 60% off!
Ana: Is that what the girl with sandwich board was talking about?
Me: Yeah, you can find great savings at the seasonal department and the front vestibule!
Ana: Get these great savings while they last!
Me: AC MOORE ROCKS!
This is played on rotation and Big Paul is coming tomorrow... I wonder if he'll appreciate it....If you hadn't guessed already, Sheri was the one walking around the store with a sandwich board."

Big Paul is the VP in charge of that area. When he visits, it's a tense, "quaking in your boots" kinda time. It was fun working there. For a job with little pay...it was pretty cool. I miss those guys.

The View

Since I'm new to Seattle and don't have a place of my own yet, I am staying with a very wonderful and generous couple, Gary and Sheri Kingsbury. They have opened up their upstairs mini apartment to me and for that I am grateful. They live in Shoreline which is north of Seattle. From the balcony off the office, there is a pretty great view of Puget Sound and the mountains beyond. I have use of the computer, a bathroom and even a minifridge. I'm not here much but it's great to have a place to hang your hat. (even though I only have one...hat that is) Thanks for the digs, guys!

Near/Far

Near my heart
Far from home
Near my love
Far from loved ones
Near the edge
Far from safe
Near to pain
Far from joy
Near the water
Far from sky
Near the rocks
Far from soaring
Near to chaos
Far from order
Near the chasm
Far from a bridge
Near the waves
Far from shore
Near to tears
Far from laughter
Near to empty
Far from full
Near the fire
Far from warm
Near the void
Far from God

Copyright 2005 Marty Gordon

Hurricane Dennis

Another hurricane has hit my hometown of Pensacola, FL. My parents just moved back in their house in April after Ivan flooded it in Sept. of 2004. During Ivan, they spent several hours in the attic as the waters rose to about 5 feet in the house. I talked to them today and the house is okay after Dennis. A tree was on the garage but it didn't sound major. At least no flooding this time around. I'm just glad they are safe. God, no more for Pensacola. They've had enough. Let 'em recover.

Bubba and Bruce

Watched the movie "Bubba Ho-Tep" last night. I'll just say that Bruce Campbell is the king of modern B movies. Which, in a way, is a shame. He seems like he has some decent acting chops. I'd like to see him get a chance at something legit. The movie was pretty dumb. The premise: Elvis and a black man claiming to be JFK (Ossie Davis of all people) battle a mummy who is sucking the souls out of the residents of an East Texas nursing home. It's all based on a short story by Joe R. Lansdale who I know to be a pretty freaky author. I liked his book "The Bottoms" but then I read another one by him called "Freezer Burn" and it was very, very strange. So, if you're into weird and like Bruce Campbell, check it out. If not, skip it.

The Fantasticks Four?

How surreal! I am sitting at Sarah's computer at Taproot Theater (where she works) and as I am sitting here there is a rehearsal for "The Fantasticks" going on upstairs. The sound is piped in so I can hear every last thing that is going on. I've never seen the show before so I'm looking forward to it. Sarah says it's not one of her favorites. Still, it's cool to get to see free theater. Now, since I haven't seen either, I may have to revisit this theme later but since "The Fantasticks" isn't one of Sarah's faves and "Fantastic Four" (the movie) is getting bad reviews perhaps a merging would solve some problems. Call it "The Fantasticks Four." A superhero love story. Hmmm. I'll see the play and the movie and then share with you my take on the whole thing. Later.

Another One Rides The Bus

I'd like to take this opportunity to say that people in Seattle drive like idiots. But I don't think it's entirely their fault. There are many things about driving in Seattle that require a certain degree of lunacy. Street parking is insane. Cars are stuck out in the street and you can't see to turn on streets with no lights because of parked cars. Also, it appears that there are way more cars than there are parking spaces. Soooo, that causes a bit of a problem as you can well imagine. Driving in Seattle is going to be tough to get used to. Perhaps in the long run I'll park my jeep and ride the bus. If the experience can inspire a song from Queen, it can't be all that bad. Can it?

Got my jeep back today. The final tally? $1700 and some change. Man, oh man! My wallet is sore! The good news is (w/ crossed fingers) insurance may cover all or most of it. So, that's good. If they do. Cover it. Please. Cover it.

I hate job hunting. Is hate too strong a word? Loathe? Abhor? No...hate just about does it. I found one job I'm interested in but I can't get the freakin' people to get back in touch with me. So annoying. Registered with a temp agency yesterday but the thought of working somewhere a few days then moving to another place just doesn't appeal to me. Argh! Here's hoping something pops up that is up my alley. God, if you are listening, I could use some help.

Sarah left this for me to read.
"God gives us the vision (to be a catalyst of change in the church) then He takes us down to the valley to batter us in to the shape of the vision. And it is in the valley that so many of us faint and give way. Every vision will be made real if we have patience. The vision is not a castle in the air but a vision of what God wants you to be. If you have ever had a vision of God, you may try as like to be satisfied on a lower level but God will never let you. He is after you, Marty! Because He loves you! He believes in you! So do I! I love you!"
I am trying to believe this but it's difficult due to the things that have happened to me. I'll keep trying. That's all I can do.

Boots or Booty?
"Jessica Simpson is a ho - ee - i - ee - ooooooo!" Wow, she's come a long way from teeny bopper Christian singer. When I was with The Company, she was on program with us at the Texas Youth Evangelism Conference. She was thirteen and was doing the Christian circuit. Seemed like a little diva to me running around with her entourage of thirteen year old girls. She would stick her butt out when she sang. I guess that part of her hasn't changed. Have you seen the "Boots Are Made For Walking" video? Man! Yes, she has changed. From little Christian wannabe sexpot to full blown pop ho. Well, God Bless America! Land where even a young Christian girl with a prominent backside can make it big. Hope everyone remembers you among all the Xtina's and Jlo's and Brittany's running around out there. (I'm just jealous of her success...really. If I had a prominent backside, I might too be making videos and starring in a remake of an old TV show...except mine would be Andy Griffith. I figure I could make Ernest T. Bass into a sex symbol. It could happen.)

NOTE: Write dramas "The Stepford Church" and "The Bride."

Just a reminder to myself to take time to write the story that's floating around in my head called, "The Yellow Cab." Do it, Marty. Do it soon.

It's been a whirlwind of vehicular activity around here. I've never driven so many cars in my life. Mine's in the shop so I am relying on the generosity of new friends to get around Seattle. Many thanks to Scott and Pam, Mark and Karen, Gary and Sheri, Hayden and Randy for the use of their cars. Right now I'm in a convertable Saab. Sarah accuses me of thinking I'm cool which isn't true. I know I am.