Envy

Several weeks ago, we talked about "envy" in our class at church on Sunday mornings. I found great comfort in knowing that most (if not all) of us in that class have been catastrophically affected by it. I know it strikes at all types of people but I think artists tend to suffer through it more. We've all heard these, even if it was just in our own head: "Why did he get that part? My voice is so much better than his," or "People are buying her art? Are you kidding me? I'm way better than she is." And so on and so forth. Envy is a very strong presence in my life right now. I am fighting a daily battle with it and feel very strongly that I may be losing the fight. So, to bolster my envy-fighting mood, I am placing these lyrics here to provide me with encouragement. It just helps to remind me that I am not alone in this fight. The song is Happy, Happy, Happy by Groovelily.

It's really great to see you once again
How are you
Word travels fast around these parts, my friend
I got the news
Heaven knows you deserve it
After all you've been through, you've earned it
You've passed with flying colors now, and

I'm going green with envy, I am brimming full of bile
I am running red with rage like it's going out of style
I'm becoming bluer every moment that life just isn't fair
And I'm yellowing with age and fear that I'll never make it there
But I'm happy, happy, happy, happy for you
Happy, happy, happy, happy for you

I'd love to hear about your future plans
Yes I would
You say this lucky break fell in your hands?
Well, that's good
You're really going places
Skipping right around the bases
I'd say that you're batting a thousand now

And I'm dangling in the dugout in my worn-out uniform
I am lagging in the lineup as I keep this old bench warm
I am making errors every time that I get near the ball
And I'm wondering if I'll ever see the major leagues at all
But I'm happy, happy, happy, happy for you
Happy, happy, happy, happy for you

And you're so nice
And you're so kind
And you're so giving of your time
To a friend like me who can't help but speak his mind
And I find...

That I wish you hadn't come here, and I'm wishing you would stay
And I'm hoping whatever charm you got will rub off on me today
And I know that all my stumbling blocks are only in my head
But still I'm simultaneously wishing you were dead, and feeling
Happy, happy, happy, happy for you
Happy, happy, happy, happy for you

© Milburn 2002