Weird Poetry

Jackie boy's favorite toy
Is a headless doll named Al
Jackie boy loves his toy
It is his best-loved pal
The head is lost, we don't know where
It popped off on the rug
Perhaps young Jackie shouldn't squeeze
So hard when he gives hugs

Jimmy Keen lost his spleen
In a freaky accident
He ran too fast into the woods
Tripped on a log and went
The doctor put it in a jar
He keeps it on a shelf
And when he's feeling incomplete
He looks upon himself

Willy Wee is 8 foot 3
A tad bit short of 9
He's quite content to be that tall
The weather up there's fine
But Willy Wee went up to ski
The mountains on a date
He fell real bad and now he's sad
'Cuz now he's 3 foot 8

Becca Boo is such a shrew
To everyone she's mean
She scares the witches off their brooms
On every Halloween
But Huey Hoo loved Becca Boo
He loved her strong and true
It melted her heart, that angry tart
And now she cries, "Boo-Hoo."

Neddy Bock has dreadlocks
In Jamaica he's a hit
But soldiers in the army
Well, they don't give a spit
Neddy Bock met Sgt. Mock
"You look a sight," he called
Sarge took him to a barber
And now old Neddy's bald

Sammy Spud just loved the mud
In dirt he'd play and play
His mom would try to clean him up
But he stayed the color gray
One time he played real near the pond
And on him crawled a leech
It breached the crud and sucked his blood
Now Sammy bathes in bleach

Pammy Bam ate nothing but jam
On toast and bread and spoon
Strawberry, grape and marmalade
Morning, night and noon
Eating jelly, she grew a belly
And soon began to sneeze
Now Pammy Bam's on insulin
'Cuz she has diabetes

Lemmy Slug is such a bug
The people want to squish him
He dodges shoes all day long
And soon he started wishin'
"I wish I was a giant
With shoes on big, old feet
Then I could squish the people
That I might chance to meet

Bessie June went to the moon
She dwelled inside a crater
The Moonie Men who lived there
Soon began to hate her
She swept up all the moon rocks
And put them in a case
But Moonie Men, the like moon rocks
To decorate their place

Timmy Thicket is a cricket
He plays accordion
The other crickets tease him
For not playing violin
The teasing hurts poor Timmy
But he's too proud to beg
Besides, he can't play violin
Poor Timmy's got no legs

Poltice Fig danced a jig
He liked to sway and swing
He cut a rug, that graceful fig
He was a prancing thing
Someone lost their marbles
And Poltice rolled and slipped
Now he doesn't dance no more
With his light fantastic tripped

The King of Mole lives in a hole
But it's cozy, bright and clean
He moved aside the dirt and mud
And trimmed the roots between
It rained one day and half the night
His home began to flood
And so the mighty King of Mole
Is now the king of mud

Daffy Nate went on a date
With Loony Nora Lum
She laughed at all his crazy jokes
Although they were quite dumb
Now Daffy Nate and Loony Lum
Are married with 10 tots
Their dating life was lots of fun
But married life is not

Mimsy Moore sits on the floor
Arranging peas and flowers
Although the combo seems quite odd
She whiles away the hours
She wants a pea and flower shop
Her dream for quite some time
But peas and flowers just won't sell
Not even for a dime

Howie Nows loves white cows
Their color gives him cause
To paint them in an earthly hue
With brushes, pens and gauze
He is quite famous in the land
From Kalamazoo to Laos
His gallery's name, it seems quite right
Howie Now's Brown Cows

Parker Gack has the knack
For talking to the mice
He doesn't like the squirrels too much
But rodents he thinks nice
He had 100 in his home
1000 in his attic
And 23 in his TV
Now all he gets is static

Peter Fleen loves Halloween
He decorates every room
In orange and green he can be seen
Donned in his pumpkin costume
He treasures most his friend the ghost
And a black cat name of Whiz
They trick or treat in rain and sleet
No matter what day it is

Tex McRoy is a cowboy
More cow than boy they say
He's mounted horns upon his hat
And he eats alot of hay
He fell in love with Bessie
A lovely heifer chick
He's milking it for all it's worth
But it's really udderly sick

Jacques LeMoo runs a zoo
For chickens, pigs and ducks
He doesn't like the other sorts
Just those that oink and cluck
One windy day, a cow blew in
It caused alot of grief
Jacques solved the problem with his axe
And now their set for beef

Eb and Flo are twins you know
They live next to the ocean
The tides move in, the tides move out
Based on their least emotion
One day Eb was feeling cold
But Flo was getting hotter
They fought about the temperature
And now they're underwater

Nikki Nell has gone to Hell
To visit Uncle Scratch
She lights her pipe upon the rocks
She doesn't need a match
Her Uncle Scratch is not at home
He won't answer the bell
So Nikki has to turn around
And get the hell out of Hell

Toffee Sote had a goat
It ate up cans and weeds
The goat, it's name was Saffron Sue
And followed Toffee's lead
It followed her to school one day
And ate up all the books
Now when Toffee does homework
Inside the goat she looks

Hurricane Ned has a big head
It's full of heated air
Everywhere that Ned does go
The people point and stare
All eyes on Ned, he hates his head
And wishes it would shrink
Suddenly, Ned burps real loud
Small head, but what a stink

LaLa Baines sings in the rain
And dances in the puddles
The ducks all swim in rhythm
And the worms all coo and cuddle
LaLa's notes are perfect pitched
Though good, she never gloats
And after singing, gargles
With raindrops down her throat

Skully Boo has one tattoo
It covers head to toe
He's painted like a skeleton
So he looks rather dead
At Halloween, he looks real keen
No costume does he wear
He wins the costume contest every year
Now, that really isn't fair

Copyright 2005 Marty Gordon