If Life is a Performance...

"If life is a performance and I am not an actor am I supposed to lie down and die?" - Juliana Hatfield

Every time I hear this song (Dying Proof from the album Only Everything) the words printed above strike me in a different way. Most times I do feel as if life is a big performance and I'm not doing too well as an actor. As an actor on stage, I do pretty well. It's always been pretty easy for me to act like someone else...on stage. But in life, I gotta be me. In the immortal words of Popeye the Sailor Man, "I yam what I yam." I find it difficult to be something that I'm not in everyday life. All the lies, deceit, and hypocrisy that assail us make me ill. I am not perfect but many people lie, cheat and steal their way through life and it seems society is bent in a way to allow this to happen. So sue me for wanting honesty and integrity to accompany me on my journey. Being a Christian (and not a very good one at that) I know that the answer lies in sin. We are born sinful and only through Jesus can we begin to live a life that is exemplary. I know this. But I also know that, in my experience, the worst behavior I have seen displayed has come from fellow Christians. Somehow, they have brainwashed themselves into believing that it's ok to lie to cover your butt. It's ok to cheat as long as the end justifies the means. Well, I don't like it! When God called me to ministry (also something I'm not doing too well at) I felt as though he wanted me to be a catalyst for change. But I don't know how to do that. So, in rating my performance as a actor in this play we call life, I don't think I'm doing too well. But I'm not ready to lie down and die just yet.